Fred Clark tells us that years ago, back in the stone age gamer days of Pong and Space Invaders, there was a text only version of the Left Behind game you could play on your Commodore 128.  Kinda like Zork…but with more sacred violence.

(I think Fred’s being a bit sarcastic and maybe even a tad bitter here…)

You are in Manhattan. There is an infidel here.
>Convert infidel.

The infidel does not want to be converted.
>Convert infidel.

The infidel does not want to be converted.
>Convert infidel.

The infidel does not want to be converted.
>Witness to infidel.

The infidel does not want to be converted.
>tell infidel about Hell

Such language!

You are in Manhattan. There is an infidel here.
>tell infidel about eternal suffering and gnashing of teeth in the lake of fire

The infidel does not want to be converted.
>shoot infidel

You raise the BFG-9000 and fire, raining divine judgment on the infidel in a righteous hail of molten lead. The infidel falls over, dead.

Score: 105 out of 500.

You are in Manhattan. There is a dead infidel here.
>examine dead infidel.

On the body of the dead infidel you find more change for the pay phone.
>get change.

You are in Manhattan. There is a dead infidel here.
>make phone call

You have to find a phone first!

You are in Manhattan. There is a dead infidel here.
>n

Well that beats Zork any day.  On a more serious note, one of Fred’s commenters urges us to check out the Left Behind Games FAQ.  You should, but only if you can handle the occasional peek down into the Pit…

Does anyone get killed in the game?
People do perish in our game just like some do in the book series. This is a real strategy game, so the gamer controls his forces just like you do in chess game.

Why does this game have to contain violence at all? Why is it necessary for a fun and successful game?
Violence is not required to make a fun game. However, it is required to make a game about the end of the world in the Left Behind book series. We have taken great care to make certain that there are real consequences for poor gamer behavior, unlike most games in the market. For instance, unnecessary killing will result in lower Spirit points which are essential to winning.

I especially liked this one: 

What distinctive features differentiate LEFT BEHIND: Eternal Forces from other RTS games on the market?
Parents need a substitute for the degrading moral values of games like ’Grand Theft Auto.’ We’re giving the industry an RTS game that is fun to play as well incorporating inspirational content.

And let’s face it, there’s very little in this life more inspirational and conducive to a wholesome moral childhood then making the streets run red with the blood of the infidel for spirit points.  I hear promotional copies have been handed out in a few megachurches.  You can imagine parents tucking them alongside their bibles in their laps, reading the cover blubs on the ride home and after playing a few rounds with the kids, perhaps, walking calmly to the bathroom, standing in front of the bathroom mirror, peering in, and asking the face on the other side what the hell they’ve let themselves become.