Day Side / Night Side
Do you have a composer who speak to you? Not some trendy pop band…but a pure music classical composer, whose music seems to define you in a way none other does?
I have two. When I was a teen, I discovered Shostakovitch. Mom and I were driving alone to California, defying her family to visit dad’s side. I remember it clearly…we were driving through Pennsylvania west on I-70 after having dropped grandma at her brother’s house. It caused a family uproar, but we were both determined. That night, I was driving and she was nodding off in the passenger’s side. We were going to California. I had the radio on to some random classical station, and driving down that empty highway I heard music that just said it all to me at that point in my life. I was alienated, confused and utterly alone it seemed. And here was this amazing symphony that just said it all.
I later learned that it was Shostakovitch’s first symphony, composed when he was just sixteen. It was amazing how well it said it all. All though the rest of my adolescence I devoured his music. His symphonic music. It touched me in a place no others did.
Later, as I grew older, I discovered the music of Ralph Vaughan-Williams. His music touched another side of me…a side that was tender and wounded, and struggling to assert itself in my consciousness. The side that believed in the beautify of life. The side that believes that’s all that really matters.
We probably all have that struggle in ourselves. One side dark, lonely and alienated…the other hopeful and believing. Sometimes we find music that speaks to them. Shostakovitch speaks to that dark lonely alienated side of me…the side that knows that Sturgeon was right…that ninety percent of everything is bullshit. The side that knows that the bullshit often wins. Vaughan-Williams speaks to my other side. The side that knows that doesn’t matter.
These are me. The Shostakovitch piece is only good for the first three movements. That last movement is silly…giddy…a bit hysterical if you ask me. It’s too giddy…like he’s faking himself out. But the first three movements are pure gold. The Vaughan-Williams piece is pure gold all the way though…especially the last movement. The obo concerto on that album is beautiful too. But the symphony is gold. Pure gold. These are me. These links are to the performances of each that are, in my opinion, correct. They’re Amazon MP3s if you care to download them and listen. They’re not expensive and I think worth every penny. Beautiful music, each in its own way. These are me.
Oh…and here’s Shostakovitch 1, in case you’re interested. This one’s pretty close to what I heard that night long ago, which was performed by the Moscow Radio Symphony Orchestra. I don’t recall who was conducting…but the Russians seem to get this one better then anyone else does…