In my server logs today…the following google search string:

"long distance phone call" "vietnam war" penis

Your guess.  Mine.  Good as.

So I have friends down in Florida (and readers according to my server logs…) and places I’ve visited that I’ve become fond of.  So I’m checking the news headlines for the latest on Fay.  Last night I heard that the storm might wander offshore, strengthen again and take another swing at Florida.

So what do I see when I look at Google News…?

`Fickle Fay’ Loses Strength, Hurricane Watch Dropped

Tropical Storm Fay May Strike Land Again

Tropical Storm Fay fizzles in Florida

Tropical Storm Fay expected to gain strength today

Tropical storm Fay gathers strength over Florida

Fay intensifies by feeding off warm inland waters

Not a hurricane yet, but Fay spreads damage in Florida

Clear now?  Me too… 

Many years ago, I saw someone get hit by a train.  I won’t describe it in more detail then that here, other then it wasn’t anyone I knew and I wasn’t all that close to it so I don’t have to remember it in too much detail.  But to this day I can recall the sickening moment when I saw it was about to happen.

So today I’m reading some random Internet news headlines and finding myself very grateful that my nightmares didn’t include him getting up and walking away afterward…

Person hit by train, walks away

Paramedics responded to reports of an individual being hit by a train at Bardwell Park, in Sydney’s south, at about 8.20am (AEST) today.

However, police and paramedics did not find anyone or any sign of injury at the scene, NSW Ambulance says.

Authorities watched CCTV footage of the incident, which showed someone stand up and walk away after being hit by a train.

The rational thing is to be glad that he survived.  But rationally it’s hard to imagine someone just standing up and walking away either.  A train is Massive.  Adding to the creepiness factor, there isn’t a lot of detail in the story, and so the mind naturally fills in the blanks. 

Via Fark…

Man with condom on found bitten to death by snake

Ayutthaya – A body of a 40-year-old man with a cobra carcass in his head was found on a roadside here Sunday morning.

An preliminary autopsy also found that Wiroj Banlen, 40, was wearing a condom although he was putting on his trousers. No semen was found inside the condom.

His body was found on the side of a dirt road in Tambon Lamsai of Ayutthaya’s Wangnoi district at 7 am.

He was bitten several times by the snake on his right leg and on his cheeks.

His hands were clenching the dead cobra, whose body was bitten several times especially on its stomach.

The preliminary autopsy found scales of the snake in his mouth.

His body was sent for a full autopsy at a hospital.

This story is from Thailand, and the translation may be a tad…off.  So I’m trying to unpack this.  His body was found by the roadside.  He was bitten several times by a cobra.  Some of the bites were on his right leg, the others on his cheeks.  I assume the cheek bites happened while he was trying to eat the cobra.  His pants seem to have been at least partly undone and he was wearing a condom as though he was about to have sex, but hadn’t yet.  I’m sitting here thinking that if there is a God it must have created human beings because a universe that obeys quantum physics just wasn’t strange enough.