Given my profession (software engineer), and all the time I spend at my drafting table, and my age, I should probably not enjoy deep fried food as much as I do.  But done right, deep fried ranks just above bar-b-que in my table of delights.  The City Place cafe downtown makes a deep fried crab cake dinner that is decadent. 

My love affair with battered fish fry began with a fast food chain that you don’t see much of, at least around Maryland, anymore: Arthur Treacher’s Fish and Chips.  I’d only vaguely heard of the British thing for Fish and Chips, but never had any until the chain came into town and I was instantly hooked.  But then they went the way of Burger Chef, Roy Rodger’s and Boston Market and eventually I got tired of trying to find an acceptable substitute.  Neither Popeye’s nor Long John Silver’s do it to my liking.  So, having my own kitchen by then (prior to my working as a software developer, I lived in rented rooms here and there), I decided to try my own hand at it.

It was risky business because at the time I was really not much good in a kitchen.  I could do a TV dinner and a few routine sandwiches, and that was about it.  The year I got my first kitchen, I made myself a Thanksgiving feast and learned how to make mashed potatoes (you…uhm…slice them, boil them, and mash them.  A little half and half and butter helps…).  Obviously I got the turkey ready-made  I’m still not all that good in the kitchen, but I’m learning that the trick to it is, at least for me, focusing on stuff you really like so much you’re more then happy to clean up the mess afterward.  I bought a good deep fryer, and hunted around the Internet for recipes that looked similar to what Arhur Treacher’s was doing.  When I found a few, I began to play around a bit.  I also bought a ready-made fish fry mix from Zatarain’s for comparison, and studied the ingredient list.

I tried one thing and another.  A little of this seasoning, a little of that.  Dry rolling first, then batter second.  Whole wheat flour verses all purpose.  Eventually I started getting something I enjoyed.  The year I moved here to Casa del Garrett, my neighbors had a 4th of July cookout, and I did a previous version of my fish fry (the current one is only slightly different).  Everyone loved it.  Next year it was "Of course you’ll do your fish fry…"  I was floored.  It’s been like that ever since.  Now…I could get my cartoons published in gay community newspapers…I could have them praised by professionals whom I deeply admire…I could have people from all over the world come to read my blog even though I don’t advertise it, and complement me on my writing…I could become a software engineer for the Hubble Space Telescope…but I would never in a million years ever dream that anyone would like anything I cooked.

Last year, just prior to one of the worse sets of layoffs we’ve had at the Institute, our branch had its annual picnic and I desperately wanted to score good will points with my co-workers.  Of course such decisions aren’t made on the basis of what you bring to a picnic, and of course I was working furiously on the job to make sure my presence was regarded as necessary to the team.  But by god if my fate ended up in the balance somewhere, I was going to make goddamned sure I had every little brownie point on my side I could gather.  So I took a chance, because I’m such a freakin wall flower at these kinds of events, and offered to do my fish fry.  I can tell you at our picnics food is plentiful and excellent, so the best I hoped for my fish was to be noticed a tad, and looked upon with kindness.  Well…Every last friggin bit of it disappeared…and for days afterward I was getting complements on it, along with "Of course you’ll bring it next year too…"

Darn tootin’!  Last year it was desperation…this year it was pride.  They like my fish fry…they can have all they want…  We had our picnic just yesterday and it was worth all the mess and hassle to see how well it was enjoyed.  I bought twice as much fish as last year, and it still vanished pretty quickly.  Every last bit of it.  Except the three pieces I ate myself.  I am still my own best customer.

Summer is upon us, and it’s cookout time.  You can smell the food on weekends coming from all the grills in my rowhouse neighborhood and it’s lovely.  So…I want to share.  Here is the recipe I commonly serve now.  I still love to tweak it, but this is the favorite.  For the picnic I doubled the portions here, and had plenty.

Deep Fry Batter #5

Ingredients:

Fry Batter

• 1 Egg, Jumbo or Large
• 1 Cup White Baking Flour
• ¼ Cup Corn Starch
• 1 Teaspoon Sea Salt
• 1 Cup Yuengling Lagar
• 1 Tsp Paprika
• 1 Tsp Cayenne Pepper
• 1 Tsp Garlic Powder
• 1 Tsp freshly ground Black Pepper

Other

• Lemon Juice for dipping (enough to fill small bowl).
• Fresh Hake fillets as needed (I buy at Whole Foods).
• Peanut oil for deep fryer

Make Fry Batter:

• Put flour and cornstarch into holding bowl (Sift if needed)
• Beat egg, salt, pepper, other seasonings and Yuengling in mixing bowl until smooth
• Mix in flour and cornstarch. Batter should be somewhere between runny and thick.  Add more Yuengling if needed, but easy does it.  A little goes a long way.
• Let stand at least 30 minutes. An hour is better.  Stir again before use.

Prepare to fry:

• Heat peanut oil in deep fryer. I usually set the heat to 355 degrees.  Never use a deep fryer that doesn’t regulate temperature as they’re too dangerous a fire hazard.
• Fill small bowl with lemon juice.
• Cut hake into friable size portions and wash.

To Fry:

• Dip Hake in Lemon Juice.
• Dip in fry batter. Get it thoroughly coated.
• Put in deep fryer for 3-4 minutes until golden and floating.

Notes:

• Don’t skimp on the quality of the spices. Get the best, most aromatic ones you can find. Whole Foods has a good selection. McCormick’s "gourmet collection", which you can find in most stores alongside their regular, is good too.
•  I use an unbleached "all natural" all purpose flour, free ranging undrugged chicken’s eggs and sea salt. Not sure how important those are in the grand scheme of things though. Any old store brand of peanut oil seems to work fine.
•  I use a small pair of hotdog tongs. If you just plop the fish in the fryer it can stick to the bottom, so I gently lower it in. Whatever implement you use will need to be wiped off frequently.  Be careful…the oil will burn you.
•  Some batter flakes off while cooking and you will think you’re making funnel cakes after a while. You will need something to scoop off floating batter crumbs while you’re working.
•  Be careful. Remember hot oil is dangerous stuff.

Bruce Garrett
July 2006
Baltimore, Maryland

[Edited a tad…  I’m not sure why bullet formatting looks so bad in Firefox…]