Clickbait article this evening, about a youngish straight guy browsing Tinder, getting matched with this beautiful young lady who turns out to be an aspiring singer/actress/model with thousands of Instagram followers, and the meeting she arranges with him turns out to be an outdoor pop up concert that several dozen other men also show up to, who she’d also invited via Tinder, and she gets up on stage and announces they’re all there to compete in a contest for the prize of dating her.

Poor guy is angry for some reason. Says he’ll never trust anyone ever again. Let me tell you about having trust issues: I’m reading this and wondering if this guy is another one of her scams and his sad clickbait story is only another way she’s trying to get her name out there.

Mind you, I’m 72 and still remember everything from Nixon’s The One, the Pentagon Papers, the 18 and a half minute gap, and Expletive Deleted, to Donald Trump.

Hey guy…if you’re real then I apologise, but listen, those dating apps won’t do anything for you except make you feel even more unworthy and unmatchable. I have some experience here. Think about it. If they get you matched up then you leave and then they get no more money from you and what kind of business model is that?

What you want is a business situation that involves getting you close to a lot of people with the same sexual interests as you, but isn’t actually interested in matching you up with any of them. I speak from experience. In the 90s I spent thousands on gay dating memberships and I am still single, but people I know who spent thousands on ex-gay therapy when they were younger (or were forced into it) are now in happy, loving, same sex relationships that have lasted decades. Some of these are even married now!

Not sure if there’s anything like that for heterosexuals… apply to a religious college that emphasises sexual purity maybe… but look into it.