{"id":9327,"date":"2016-10-17T20:16:45","date_gmt":"2016-10-18T01:16:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/?p=9327"},"modified":"2016-10-17T20:16:45","modified_gmt":"2016-10-18T01:16:45","slug":"when-life-gives-you-lemons-get-you-some-salt-and-tequila-and-laugh-in-its-face","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/9327","title":{"rendered":"When Life Gives You Lemons, Get You Some Salt And Tequila And Laugh In Its Face"},"content":{"rendered":"

Feeling at tad abused by Mercedes-Benz USA today. I’ll probably bitch about it later. No…I will almost certainly bitch about it later.<\/p>\n

In the meantime…<\/p>\n

“Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.”<\/em><\/p>\n

“Oh, we use only the finest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish Ram’s bladder, emptied, steamed, flavoured with sesame seeds, whipped into a fondue, and garnished with lark’s vomit.”<\/em><\/p>\n

Forrest Gump – Monty Python crossover…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Feeling at tad abused by Mercedes-Benz USA today. I’ll probably bitch about it later. No…I will almost certainly bitch about it later. In the meantime… “Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” “Oh, we use only the finest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish Ram’s bladder, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[7],"tags":[109],"class_list":["post-9327","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-life","tag-department-of-random-complaining"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9327","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9327"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9327\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9327"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9327"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9327"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}