{"id":1184,"date":"2008-02-14T23:26:17","date_gmt":"2008-02-15T04:26:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/1184"},"modified":"2008-02-14T23:26:17","modified_gmt":"2008-02-15T04:26:17","slug":"adios-valentines-day-2008","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/1184","title":{"rendered":"Adios Valentine’s Day 2008…."},"content":{"rendered":"

What Valentine’s Day would be complete without a heartwarming story of true love succeeding against impossible odds?<\/p>\n

\n

Married prison psychologist fell pregnant after affair with mentally-ill inmate<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n

A married psychologist is about to have a baby by a mentallyill prisoner after one-to-one therapy sessions, a court heard yesterday.<\/p>\n

Stephanie Reeves, 30, had sex with the convicted criminal in the lavatories of a secure hospital unit while escorting him to the gym.<\/p>\n

He is currently being treated for paranoid schizophrenia at Ashworth secure hospital, where patients include Moors murderer Ian Brady.\n<\/p>\n

Reeves – whose husband also worked at the unit – said she loves the prisoner and plans to raise the child with him if he is ever considered safe enough to be released.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

In other news, Fark.Com is having their annual design a Valentine card you’d send to an ex<\/span> Valentine’s Day photoshop theme…<\/span><\/p>\n

\"<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

And you thought I was bitter.  So…to any knuckle-dragging homophobes who might be thinking that my little Valentine’s Day poster contest is only proof that The Gay Lifestyletm<\/sup> is inherently desperate and lonely: just peruse the cannonballs being lobbed across the gender fence over at Fark.Com.  Or just google "anti-valentine".  There’s a lot of discontent out there on the heterosexual side of the street too.  And I’ll bet you pinched faced, uptight blue noses are responsible for a lot of That<\/em> too.<\/p>\n

And in other Valentine’s Day headlines…\n<\/p>\n

\n

Razer blade found in Valentine’s Day lollipop<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n

Radio station giving away free divorce<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n

Happy Valentine’s Day From The Storm Worm<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n

Don’t let stale chocolates leave a bad taste in your valentine’s mouth<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Apparently some of those Valentine’s Day treats have been sitting on the shelves past their use-by date.  Kinda ironic, when you think about it…\n<\/p>\n

And finally, some random entires from this Fark.Com finish the sentence contest:  I knew this was going to be the worst first date ever when…<\/span><\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

she brought out those beancans and started cutting up that squirrel.<\/em><\/p>\n

He brought a can of corn along on the date.<\/em><\/p>\n

he asked to meet me in the Winn Dixie parking lot.  <\/em><\/p>\n

…he squealed the tires pulling out of my mother’s driveway, then told me he had problems telling left from right because he’d smashed one too many
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

When I realized that every time he smiled he looked like George W. Bush.<\/em><\/p>\n

when he told me how much he still loved his ex-girlfriend.
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

He showed up at the restaurant with plastic cutlery and said one can never be too careful when it comes to germs.
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

he told me "masturbation was getting kinda old"
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

When I kissed him and couldn’t get the taste of butter out of my mouth for a week.
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

My date brought me a hot cocoa sampler pack instead of flowers.
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

The second sentence she says to me, and I quote: "The way [blank] described you, I thought you would be hotter."<\/em><\/p>\n

I got my ass handed to me in Star Wars Trivial Pursuit.<\/em><\/p>\n

she wanted to cuddle afterwards.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Goodbye Valentine’s Day 2008.  It was…swell.  Let’s do it again sometime…okay? <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What Valentine’s Day would be complete without a heartwarming story of true love succeeding against impossible odds? Married prison psychologist fell pregnant after affair with mentally-ill inmate A married psychologist is about to have a baby by a mentallyill prisoner after one-to-one therapy sessions, a court heard yesterday. Stephanie Reeves, 30, had sex with the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[77],"class_list":["post-1184","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-the-dumpsville-chronicles"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1184","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1184"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1184\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1184"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1184"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brucegarrett.com\/brucelog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1184"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}