You can’t make this stuff up…

Smut-case judge posted explicit images

LOS ANGELES – A federal judge suspended the obscenity trial of a Los Angeles porn distributor Wednesday following a newspaper report that the judge had sexually explicit material on his own Web site.

Judge Alex Kozinski on Wednesday granted a joint motion to suspend the trial after the prosecution said it needed time to look into the issue of the judge’s Web site.

The judge told the jury to return on Monday. The panel spent hours at the Pasadena offices of the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals watching videos depicting bestiality and extreme fetishes.

Kozinski is chief justice of the 9th Circuit but is serving as a trial judge in the obscenity case.  Kozinski said he thought the material on his Web site couldn’t be seen by the public, the Los Angeles Times reported on its Web site. The images included a video of a "half-dressed man cavorting with a sexually aroused farm animal," the newspaper reported.

This is…not what I needed to be reading in the news feeds first thing in the morning.  Human sexuality is a…strange thing to behold…sometimes. 

Like…here… (via Dan Savage at SLOG)  I probably didn’t need to be reading this before bedtime last night…

The 11th Most Terrifying Guide to Sex

Hey, Cracked, this just arrived in my mailbox—and I actually don’t think it’s the 11th most terrifying guide to sex. I think it belongs somewhere in the top three. I certainly think it’s scarier than your #1 pick, A Hand in the Bush: The Fine Art of Vaginal Fisting, and way, way scarier than your #2 pick, Intimate Invasions: The Erotic Ins & Outs of Enema Play. I give you… The Toybag Guide to Ageplay…

I get asked all the time what Age Play is. It can mean a thousand different things to a thousand different sexual adventurers or curious roleplaying enthusiasts, but there are key threads that run through it.

Age play is any interaction or roleplay between consenting adults (or enjoyed solo by an adult) involving the concept of age as a dynamic… Age play incorporates a sensual or sexual element, buy many "age players," "kidz," babiez," or "littles" enjoy "pure" age play that is just about the role and not about any hanky panky.

Age play is not pedophilia, child porn, or individuals interested in playing with actual biological children. Age Players may use the props of "bio kids," but we are into the props and trappings, not the kids themselves in any way.

Go check out the cover of that book Savage has on display in that post.  It’s…disturbing all right…

…and I suppose because I am a geek, my mind starts wondering about where the link might be between this behavior, which really squiks me out, and how we humans are always bestowing fond diminutives on the one we love. Ever call your darling ‘baby’?  Now, you didn’t really mean that literally did you…and yet that got in there somehow.  We use words like ‘girl’ and ‘boy’ even though we’re referring to grown adults.  And then…again probably because I am a geek…the words of physicist Richard Feynman bubble into this train of thought… 

Do not keep saying to yourself, if you can possibly avoid it, “But how can it be like that?” because you will get “down the drain”, into a blind alley from which no one has yet escaped.  Nobody knows how it can be like that. 

Feynman was talking about quantum mechanics, but there are lotsa more rabbit holes a brain can go down besides that one.  Human sexuality for one.  I guess it’s what you get when you plop that rational logical thinking brain down on top of the old primate brain, down on top of the old mammalian brain, down on top of the lizard brain.  And God only knows what’s below that.  It bears close examination only by interested scientists, anthropologists and other researchers with steady nerves.  The rest of us are probably better off not knowing what our neighbors are up to. 

I am the last person on earth to be surprised to read that a judge in a bestiality case has a web site where he’s posted videos of himself some guy cavorting with animals. Squiked out, yes, but not surprised.  And probably a tad more resigned to it then most of you.  I am a romantic.  I really don’t like seeing this…really don’t like watching sex being dragged into the gutter.  But I know better then to expect it won’t be.  When I was a young man, only a few years out to myself, I had to walk a gauntlet of hard core heterosexual peep show magazines just to buy a copy of The Advocate or get a copy of the local free gay paper, because respectable news stands back then wouldn’t carry them.  I was a Baptist boy and it was an education.  Nothing I ever heard on the school yard playing ground, no dirty joke told among the rude boys, prepared me for what I saw in those adult bookstores.  I consider it one of the few benefits of growing up in more oppressive times because ever since then, whenever some gay hater starts yap, yap, yapping about how perverted homosexual sex is (Hi Pete!) I instantly find myself thinking that they’re either naive, stupid, a liar or all of the above. 

Strange?  Strange?  Well I’m here to tell you heterosexuals know how to get their strange on too and if you haven’t seen it that’s because you haven’t looked.  The human family is just plain strange period.  Gay people have no monopoly on that, and there are plenty of us who find all of that stuff positively bizarre too.

[Update…]  According to Slashdot, the files on that judge’s web site also included  …images of masturbation, public sex, contortionist sex, a transsexual striptease, and a photo of naked women on all fours painted to look like cows…  Wasn’t that a Monty Python skit…?

[Update…] It wasn’t a video of the judge apparently…my bad…